Ready for class. |
Every now and then my writing seems to fall flat, and I
start to look for ways to give it a zing. In the past, writing prompts have
helped, but I am looking for a long term solution. When a writer friend
recommended an online class I was, at first, hesitant.
I know there are the usual concerns like cost and time, but
when I looked at our budget I noticed much more frivolous spending going on.
Education is not frivolous, and too, one can make time for something that is
worthwhile, something that can improve one’s ability.
There is another concern that rattles me, fear. Fear of
failure, or in the context of writing this fear equates to rejection, but
rejection is a flimsy excuse for a writer. Unfortunately, I am all too familiar
with negative response. Anxiety is more the issue here, and it’s aimed at the
idea of an online class, something I haven’t done before.
Nothing ventured nothing gained, I tell myself, a cliché,
but it’s true. It helps to think back to a conversation I had with my father. Dad loved driving
and I often went for rides with him. On one such ride, he told me his thoughts
about the word combination, have to. He
said, “Barbara, do you know that in this world there is nothing that you have to do?” Since I was a young child
at the time, my father did not include a discussion about having to die.
This have to idea
seemed unbelievable to me. I proposed many examples to try and prove him
wrong. “You have to go to work, to sleep, to eat, dress, brush your teeth, and
etc…” Dad listened and suggested alternatives to each.
Finally, exasperated with his game, I said, “You have to go
to school.”
He said, “No, you don’t. You can stay home and watch
cartoons, or you can put off school till you are older if you want.”
Well that sounded
ridiculous to me. “Do you mean like you? You’re too old for school,” I told
him. At around age 35, Dad seemed old to me.
Perhaps he laughed before answering. “You’re never too old
to learn new things.”
My father valued education. Since he loved photography, he learned late in life
how to develop and print his own photos. When we moved to Guam, he built a boat
with a friend from work, but it didn't live up to his expectations. He either gave
it away or he salvaged it. Dad was not afraid of failing. He seemed to enjoy
the challenge.
I finished my traditional college degree when I was
forty-nine. Now, a decade later, it’s time for another challenge. Thanks Dad.